Episode 142

So Help Me God

Sunday, June 14, 202644 min

A sermon part of "Family Matters" sermon series by Pastor Greg Harvey.

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Devotionals from This Message

Five short reflections drawn from this message — Monday through Friday.

Daily devotion

The Burden Only God Can Bear

Tuesday

'He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.' - Proverbs 18:22

We live in a culture that tells us to find our "other half" or our "soulmate"—someone who will complete us and make us whole. This sounds romantic, but it places an impossible burden on another human being. When we ask someone to be what only God can be, we set them up for failure and ourselves for disappointment.

No person can satisfy the deepest longings of your heart. No spouse can give you complete identity, purpose, or fulfillment. These are gifts that come from your relationship with God alone. When we understand this truth, it transforms how we approach relationships—from a place of desperate need to a place of grateful abundance.

A healthy relationship isn't two incomplete people trying to become whole together. It's two whole people, complete in Christ, choosing to share their lives in love. This shift in perspective changes everything about how we love, serve, and commit to one another.

The greatest mistake that people make in relationships is they ask a person to be what only God can be.

Reflect: In what ways have you been asking others to fulfill needs that only God can meet?

Prayer: Lord, help me find my completeness in You alone. Free me from placing unrealistic expectations on others and teach me to love from a place of wholeness.

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Episode 143Jun 21, 202642 min

Fighting Fair

A sermon part of "Family Matters" sermon series by Pastor Greg Harvey.

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Episode 141Jun 7, 202639 min

Family Issues

Message summary

Marriage is under attack because it represents Christ's relationship with the church. Many marriages fail not from lack of hope, but from misplaced focus. The key to lasting marriage is found in Matthew 6:33: seek God first, and everything else will be added. When couples make their spouse their ultimate source of fulfillment instead of God, disappointment is inevitable. Singles should use their time to become the right person rather than just looking for the right person. Married couples who pray together regularly have less than 1% divorce rate. Whether single or married, putting God first transforms relationships and creates the foundation for lasting love.

Seeking God First: The Key to a Marriage That Lasts

Marriage is under attack in our culture, and there's a reason for it. A healthy marriage serves as the greatest earthly picture of Christ's relationship with the church. When marriages fall apart, it distorts this beautiful representation of God's love for His people.

Why Do Marriages Fail When They Start With So Much Hope?

Every marriage begins with incredible hope. No couple stands at the altar thinking about divorce or growing apart. Yet statistics show that 50% of marriages end in divorce. The problem isn't a lack of hope—it's a misplaced focus on what marriage is supposed to accomplish. When couples make traditional vows, they promise "to have and to hold, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, forsaking all others as long as we both shall live." These vows typically end with "so help me God." This phrase shouldn't just be a declaration—it should be a desperate request recognizing that we need divine help to fulfill such promises.

What Does It Mean to Seek God First in Marriage?

Jesus gave us a powerful formula in Matthew 6:33: "'But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.'" This principle is the foundation for every successful marriage. A great marriage isn't built when two people seek each other first. A great marriage is built when two people seek God first. The problem is that many people are trying to get God's results while ignoring God's design.

The Greatest Commandment and Marriage

When asked about the greatest commandment, Jesus responded: "'You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul and all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment'" (Matthew 22:37-38). Notice the order—God comes first, not your spouse. This doesn't mean you love your spouse less. It means you love God most, and everything else falls into proper alignment.

Why Your Spouse Can't Be Your "One"

Our culture promotes the idea of finding "the one"—that perfect person who will complete us and make life wonderful. But this places an impossible burden on another human being.

The Problem With Making Your Spouse Your Everything

When we ask our spouse to be what only God can be, we set them up for failure. Only God can: - Complete you - Fulfill you completely - Give you lasting joy and peace - Provide your ultimate purpose and identity What you idolize, you'll eventually demonize. That laid-back guy you fell in love with becomes "lazy" in your eyes. That organized woman becomes a "nag." When we put our spouse on a pedestal that belongs only to God, disappointment is inevitable.

What Should Single People Do While Waiting?

If you're single, seek the One while preparing for your two. Stop spending all your energy looking for the right person while neglecting to become the right person.

Become What You're Looking For

The question isn't "Who am I going to marry?" The question is "Who am I becoming?" You attract what you are, not what you want. If you want a godly marriage, become a godly person first. Singleness isn't God's waiting room—it's His training ground. Use this time to: - Develop your character - Learn spiritual disciplines - Become emotionally healthy - Grow financially responsible - Learn to communicate and forgive And remember: you won't find your godly spouse in ungodly places. Get out of the clubs and bars if you want to find someone who shares your values.

How Can Married Couples Seek God Together?

If you're married, seek the One with your two. One of the most powerful ways to do this is through prayer together.

The Power of Praying Together

A Family Life study revealed shocking statistics: - Only 8% of Christian couples pray together regularly - Of those couples who do pray together, less than 1% end in divorce That means if you want better than a 99% chance your marriage will last, pray together regularly. Prayer creates spiritual intimacy and reminds you that you're on the same team fighting for the same goals.

How to Start Praying Together

If you're not currently praying together, start simple: - Read a devotion together (one person reads, the other prays) - Hold hands while praying - Pray for your family, marriage, and church - Take turns leading prayer each day It might feel awkward at first, but it will transform your marriage. It's hard to stay angry with someone you're committed to praying with regularly.

What If Your Spouse Doesn't Share Your Faith?

If your spouse doesn't attend church or share your faith, don't give up. Seek the One while praying for your two. God is the only one who changes hearts. One woman prayed over her husband's pillow for years, asking God to make him restless without Christ in his life. Eventually, her husband couldn't sleep and asked what she was doing. When she told him about her prayers, he came to church and gave his heart to Christ. Today they're a beautiful example of a couple seeking God together.

Life Application

This week, make a commitment to put God first in your relationship status, whether single or married. If you're single, spend time each day seeking God and developing the character traits you want in a future spouse. If you're married, start praying together daily, even if it's just for five minutes. Ask yourself these questions: - Am I expecting my spouse (or future spouse) to fulfill needs that only God can meet? - How can I better seek God first in my daily life? - What steps will I take this week to prioritize my relationship with God above all other relationships? - If married: When will my spouse and I commit to praying together regularly? Remember, God designed marriage to be a blessing, but it requires His help to fulfill the vows you made. When you seek Him first, everything else—including your marriage—will fall into its proper place.

Summary

This sermon focuses on the importance of putting God first in marriage relationships. The pastor emphasizes that marriage is under attack because it represents the relationship between Christ and the church. He explains that while every marriage begins with hope, many fail because couples seek fulfillment in each other rather than in God first. The key message is found in Matthew 6:33 - 'seek first the kingdom of God' - which should be applied to marriage. A great marriage is built when two people seek God first, not when they seek each other first. The pastor addresses both single and married individuals, encouraging singles to seek God while preparing to become the right person, and encouraging married couples to pray together regularly. Statistics show that less than 1% of couples who pray together regularly end in divorce, compared to the 50% divorce rate overall.

Intro Prayer

Heavenly Father, we come before You today with open hearts and minds, ready to receive what You want to teach us about relationships and marriage. We acknowledge that You are the foundation of all healthy relationships, and we ask for Your wisdom and guidance as we discuss these important truths together. Help us to be honest with ourselves and with each other, and show us how to apply these principles in our own lives. We pray that You would speak to each person here according to their specific needs, whether they are single, married, or somewhere in between. Open our hearts to what You want us to learn today. In Jesus' name, Amen.

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So Help Me God

Transcript

Devotionals from This Message

The Burden Only God Can Bear

Continue listening

Fighting Fair

Family Issues

Message summary

Seeking God First: The Key to a Marriage That Lasts

Why Do Marriages Fail When They Start With So Much Hope?

What Does It Mean to Seek God First in Marriage?

The Greatest Commandment and Marriage

Why Your Spouse Can't Be Your "One"

The Problem With Making Your Spouse Your Everything

What Should Single People Do While Waiting?

Become What You're Looking For

How Can Married Couples Seek God Together?

The Power of Praying Together

How to Start Praying Together

What If Your Spouse Doesn't Share Your Faith?

Life Application

Group Discussion Guide

Summary

Intro Prayer

Ice Breaker

Key Verses

Questions

Life Application

Key Takeaways

Ending Prayer